FWD: Lancelot’s Choice – Her Way or No Way

Beauty and the Witch

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur’s youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, If after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death. The question was: What do women really want?

Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, And to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch’s proposition to have an answer by year’s end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men, and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high as the witch was famous through out the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table, and Arthur’s closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunch-backed and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc.

He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden, but Lancelot, having learnt of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur’s life. And the reservation of the Round Table. Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered.

Arthur’s question thus: ‘What do women really want?
She said, ‘Is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth. And that Arthur’s life would be spared. And so it was. The neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom. And Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding. The honeymoon hour approached and, Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened. The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth be her horrible and deformed self only half the time. And the beautiful maiden the other half.

‘Which would you prefer?’ She asked him.
‘Beautiful during the day ….. or at night?’
Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day he could have a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch! Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day? But by night a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous, intimate moments with?

(If you are a man reading this…) What would YOUR choice be?
(If you are a woman reading this) What would YOUR MAN’S choice be?

What Lancelot chose, is given below:
BUT… make YOUR choice before you scroll down below… OKAY?

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Noble Lancelot, knowing the answer the witch gave Arthur to his question, he said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time. Because, he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now… what is the moral to this story?

The moral is…
1) There is witch in every woman no matter how beautiful she is!
2) If you don’t let a woman have her own way, things are going to get ugly.

So, always remember:
IT’S EITHER ‘HER WAY’ OR IT’S ‘NO WAY’!!!

Monday Blues Series – 710

Yesterday I was having some work done at the workshop. Someone came in and asked for a ‘seven-hundred- ten’.
We all looked at each other, and the mechanic asked, “What is a seven-hundred-ten?”
Obviously not a petrolhead, or having little knowledge about cars, the person replied, “You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine. I lost it and need a new one. It had always been there.”
The mechanic gave the person a piece of paper and a pen and asked the person to draw what the little piece looked like. The person drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710 !!
He then took the person over to another car which had the hood up and asked, “Is there a 710 on this car?”
The person pointed and said, “Of course, it’s right there.”

Yesterday I was having some work done at the workshop. Someone came in and asked for a ‘seven-hundred-ten’.

We all looked at each other, and the mechanic asked, “What is a seven-hundred-ten?”

Obviously not a petrolhead, nor having much knowledge about cars, the person replied, “You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine. I lost it and need a new one. It had always been there.”

The mechanic gave the person a piece of paper and a pen and asked the person to draw what the little piece looked like. The person drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710 !!

He then took the person over to another car which had the hood up and asked, “Is there a 710 on this car?”

The person pointed and said, “Of course, it’s right there.”

710

Monday Blues Series is aimed at lighting up your Mondays when you reluctantly drag yourself to work. It will be a series of pictures, jokes, or light articles that will, hopefully, bring some life into you. Stay tuned every Monday at 9 a.m. (Malaysian time, +0800 GMT) for my Monday Blues Series.

Polyphony’s Tribute to Ferrari 458 Italia

This got me drooling. Gran Turismo 5 on PlayStation3 is finally here! (Umm, well, we have to wait until next Christmas actually) Polyphony Digital Inc. has just released a teaser/tribute to the latest Ferrari 458 Italia. This prancing horse should be available for players to drive in the Real Driving Simulator. All the images in the video are computer generated and it should be the level of detailed graphics you get while playing the game on the Sony console.

Monday Blues Series – Sardar Jee Jokes

Sardar Jee
Sardar Jee

Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar: India ..
Boss: which part?
Sardar: What ‘which part’? Whole body was born in India .

2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb
explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more.

Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with ‘T’.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea.. All cars that I know start with petrol.

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

Museum Administrator: That’s a 500-year-old statue u’ve broken.
Sardar: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Sardar: Control yourself. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?

Sardar: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Sardar: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is ‘All India Radio!

NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE :
In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Sardar: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. …..
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Sardar: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup…

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Sardar: An old king’s skeleton.
Tourist: Who’s that smaller skeleton next to it?
Sardar: That was same king’s skeleton when he was a child
.

Monday Blues Series is aimed at lighting up your Mondays when you reluctantly drag yourself to work. It will be a series of pictures, jokes, or light articles that will, hopefully, bring some life into you. Stay tuned every Monday at 9 a.m. (Malaysian time, +0800 GMT) for my Monday Blues Series.

A Letter to MJ

Michael Jackson
Michael Joseph Jackson (August 29, 1958 – June 25, 2009)

Dear Michael,

It is almost two months that you have unexpectedly left us. When you announced your farewell concert in London ‘This Is It’, we are all looking forward to an unforgettable curtain call. Even though I was not able to attend the concert, I was hoping to at least get a DVD of the concert when it is released. However, now we are all left with just THE final performance of yours, to be released in cinema on 30th October 2009.

It all started when I bought my first English album and was introduced to a world of pop music, and met the King of Pop. You potrayed a Bad image for the album, pretended to be the Smooth Criminal, and even boasted about the Dirty Diana. But you did not forget to remind us to make a change starting from the Man In The Mirror. I still remember that I listened to the tape so much that it was eventually spoilt.

I still Remember The Time when your Dangerous album was released, I bought both the tape and the CD, which was a relatively new technology back then. I even bought a CD player just to listen to your songs so that the tape would not get Jammed due to long hours of playback. After your previous album, you have undergone some changes and sometimes it made me wonder if you are Black Or White, but that did not matter as long as your songs are nice. There will be things that you want to keep In The Closet, and we will all Keep The Faith in you. When you asked all of us, Will You Be There, the answer will be ‘YES’!

You followed up with the album HIStory, with so many songs that became my all time favourite. Your version of Charlie Chaplin’s Smile is my favourite song. You fought back at the people who tried so hard to tarnish your image by saying that They Don’t Really Care About Us. You Are Not Alone, Michael. When you feel like Screaming, we will always Come Together and scream with you, along with the Little Susie and The Stranger In Moscow.

In the new millenium, after a very long wait, you finally released your final all new album. I had Butterflies in my stomach when I found out about it. Your album is so nice it has proven that as the King of Pop, you are Invincible. You Rock My World whenever your song is on the radio. Your songs start my day at the Break of Dawn, when I wake up and prepare for school, and it was your songs that I listen before I go to sleep.

When us fans found out that you are dead, we tried our best not to Cry as we thought you were Unbreakable and Heaven Can Wait. A lot of us pleaded to you Don’t Walk Away, because to a lot of us, You Are My Life. However, we have slowly learnt to accept the fact that you are gone. Rest in peace Michael, and we want you to know that Whatever Happens,  you will always live inside our heart.

From your life-long fan,
aacee

Monday Blues Series – A.I.’s analysis of Love

AI_Love

Monday Blues Series is aimed at lighting up your Mondays when you reluctantly drag yourself to work. It will be a series of pictures, jokes, or light articles that will, hopefully, bring some life into you. Stay tuned every Monday at 9 a.m. (Malaysian time, +0800 GMT) for my Monday Blues Series.

FWD: You Know You are Living in 2009 when…

stoneage-computerage

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2 You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don’t have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7 Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn’t have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12 You’re reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn’t a #9 on this list

AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.